Im sure that someone up there has provided me with more rain than ever before in the history of wet miserable damp weather this ‘summer’- because they knoww im moving to a place where the sight of rain is about as often as the sight of a camel here in Manchester!! Jeeze. I am just absolutely sick to death of the puddle obstacle course i face on a daily basis on my route to work every morning and still arriving in the office with wet feet. No- NOT THE FEET- anywhere else but soggy, wet, damp feet sat stewing in an office all day. Its just not nice! Its also not fun having to hitch my legs up in the toilet at the hand dryer- trying to dry off! Balancing (badly) on one foot, I get some rather awkward looks thrown my way when people walk in…
Anyway- digressing- my favourite thing to do. Im actually writing this because i just feel like tapping down my thoughts right now. The big move is just around the corner now and im starting to feel lots of emotions as the day get’s closer. Largely reflecting. I think i need to get a grip, i’m just walking down the street (earphones in, Lana Del Ray providing the soundtrack) and i will start welling up. (Hmm on second thoughts maybe i just need to listen to some uplifting, pleasing beats rather than good old Lana!) But i have actual tears in my eyes, because im going through memories in my head. And i just realise how much i am actually going to miss everyone.
I am that kind of person that will usually try anything- pretty fearless (apart from spiders- cliché but i just dont trust things with 8 legs!) My normal tactic is to go full steam ahead with ideas and plans (and THEN think about the consequences later. Trust me, its a fun way to go about it. (Although your bank balance/ head on a Monday morning would seriously dissaprove).
I am a rarely ‘nervous’ person, that word doesn’t really come in to my vocabularly (well, actually- apart from when i go on DATES- which trust me, i have had some pretty disastrous ones. But i will save them for another day ;) a rainy day let’s say. (So that shall be…………the next 365 days then! For you lot anyway. Sorryyy had to throw that one in there!) Ok back To the nerves. So to but it bluntly- yes, i am actually feeling an eensy teensy weeny bit nervous now. Well i am allowed… I have been so excited for the last 10 months, therefore i think its only right (and human) to get the fluttering of butterflies in my stomach.
One of my best friends- Vicky (i call her my boyfriend as we’ve been coupled off all year together- shes probably the best one i’ve ever had anyway!) said something the other day that stuck in my head . We were having a bit of a heart to heart about everything, and i told her i was actually feeling a bit nervous. She said to me- ” Remember how you felt when you thought that was it. When you thought the dream was over and you hadn’t got the job. Keep that thought in your head”
So i do. And i feel better when i remind myself just that.
The point of this is…….yes it is normal to feel a bit nervous, of course you are bound to be it is a massive thing! You are actually starting afresh, somewhere new. It’s exciting, yet daunting at the same time. My best advice to you is- yes although it is hard sometimes, just ‘go with’ the emotions- it is yet another emotional rollercoaster of a ride (sick of all these, i DONT EVEN’ LIKE ROLLERCOASTERS! Pretty scared of them actually. I was always the one ‘carrying the bags’ waiting at the bottom and waving when all my mates are screaming their heads off at the top. I couldn’t even stomach the ‘runaway mine train’ at Disneyland Paris! Im a rollercoaster joke- so now clearly paying the price).
Over and out.
PS- feet are now dry.